• If thy eye offends thee: Go Veggie.


    Not so long ago, at the end of January there was a bit of a row up in Glen Affric in the Scottish highlands. It concerned the actions of the Forestry Commission Scotland. As British Gazette readers will know timber is one of the crops that can be grown in the Scottish Highlands. The climate is particularly suited for pine forests as the often harsh weather produces good timber. Basically, the quality of pine is in inverse proportion to the clemency of the weather. A temperate climate will cause the pine trees to grow quickly. The timber however is good for little more than packing crates. The same trees grown in a harsh arctic environment such as eastern Siberia grow very slowly but produce very hard and fine timber. Thus timber grown in Glen Affric will be better quality than timber grown in say, Dorset.

    British Gazette readers will also know why highland glens and mountains are not universally covered with pine trees: Red Deer. The red deer is of course the main crop on the Scottish sporting estates. Red deer however are absolute pests when it comes to planting trees. To fence against red deer is an expensive business. To keep the numbers of these pests down the Forestry Commission Scotland regularly hire guns to kill numbers of the creatures. Money is of course made from selling the meat.

    So, what is the problem? You ask.

    Daft, soppy people is the problem. The Forestry Commission Scotland committed the monumental crime of allowing the carcasses to be seen by some tourists and worse children!

    Urgent requests for counselling and personal injury lawyers – to sue for psychological injuries and doubtless compensation under the European Charter of Human Rights!


    Dear Reader: Please go to a mirror open your mouth and look at your teeth. You will see that you have an upper set and lower set of canine teeth. You are an omnivore. That is to say your diet should consist of meat and vegetables. You need both for a healthy lifestyle.

    Unfortunately we live in a society that seeks to hide certain facts from public view. Where are children supposed to think meat comes from? From Tescos, Sainsburys and Morrisons of course!

    And as for those adults upset by seeing a dead animal?

    Get a grip you pathetic people!

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