• Herman Van Rompuy: A happy man.

      6 comments

    As his Empire stands on the precipice EU commission president Herman Van Rompuy has been busy posting out copies of The World Book of Happiness edited by Leo Bormans [Paperback ISBN: 9781554079308]. Naturally the man’s actions have been subject to much mirth. Words such as “fiddling” “Rome” and “burns” will come to the minds of many. Anticipating the negative reaction Mr Van Rompuy states, “…I know the cynics will immediately dismiss these proposals as naïve…” But goes on to sate that “…Positive thinking is no longer for drifters, dreamers and the perpetually naïve…”

    There are one or two things the British Gazette takes issue with. We hope Mr Van Rompuy has financed these presents from his own resources and not the hard pressed taxpayers of the EU. If not we would ask that he reimburse the EU taxpayer from his own considerable salary. The second thing is that positive thinking has never been just for drifters, dreamers and the perpetually naïve but for everyone.

    In the spirit of seasonal goodwill the British Gazette would suggest to Mr Van Rompuy that if he really wants to make the people of the EU happy he should start by indicating that another conference should be called as soon as possible after the New Year holiday with the following agenda:

    1. An organised withdrawal from the Eurozone and inter alia the EU (exit from the EU is automatic following exit from the Eurozone) and partial default of the Eurozone members in successive order of relative indebtedness.
    2. Simultaneous application to join EFTA and acceptance from the EFTA states for these former EU members to join.
    3. Simultaneous entry into the European Economic Area.
    4. Subsequent application and acceptance from other EU members (including the UK) outside the Eurozone into EFTA.
    5. Subsequent entry into the EEA of the above.
    6. Formal termination of the EU as an entity.

    • Canute tried positive thinking; and he had far more chance of turning back the tide, than Rumpy, Sarky and Merky have of saving the Euroubel.

    • Your suggestions are of course spot on, no shortage of ‘positive thinking’ there. Your solution has been the stuff of ‘drifters, dreamers and the perpetually naive’, who have capaigned for such an outcome for more years than I care to think about! Could 2012 prove to be the year of change that will finally rids us of these fools, criminals and unelected despots, who have ruined our lives and our country?

    • Jo,

      I reckon you are being unfair to the Editor – he was not being naïve. Merely listing the things that Van Rompuy would have to do to make us all happy.

      Jack.

    • I was wondering if the rumors floating around relative to Van Rompuy are true, and his is indeed the Antichrist. As the old saying goes ones first guess is usually right, and as my initial reaction when I saw him appointed as the first ever EU president was that this harmless looking old fart could well be the man of sin. Nevertheless, as time has progressed I am now not so sure. It could depend on just how far he goes and whether or not he is promoted once more any further down the line, keeping in mind that he is seeking the presidency of the United States of Europe. If that were ever to come to pass then there would of course be a very strong like hood that he could indeed be the man of sin, or the Antichrist, as he is commonly known as. That of course would mean that he is more than happy about the general decline of the Euro as it is running now, as the main aim of the Antichrist is the general decline and ruination of humanity.

    • Oh my God! It seems the Gazette is collecting a following of nutters! I suggest that that all those believing in Antichrist theories should offer a large bribe to the Editor – see previous post – to stave off the end of the world and Judgement Day!

    • http://dotsub.com/view/01ad2718-073c-474a-ac40-c7a72e199d55#.TvBstQBE7VY.mailto

      Copy and paste, then struggle through the sub titles to see a source of happiness!
      No wonder he is smiling, or should that be laughing?

    Write a comment