• Mr Rodman’s good friend Mr Kim is well and has returned to work!


    My, My! We hear you say Dear Reader.

    Yes, you read it here. Retired professional basketball player, Dennis Keith Rodman will be very pleased that his friend Mr Kim, or to given him his full title; Marshall Kim Jong-un, Supreme Leader of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, Supreme Commander of the Korean People’s Army, First Secretary of the Central Committee Workers’ Party of Korea, Chairman of the Workers’ Party of Korea Central Military Commission and First Chairman of the National Defence Commission of the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea is alive and well and has returned to the task of enforcing his tyranical rule on the poor benighted people of his impoverished prison state.

    It appears that Mr Kim’s absence from work was due to his having a gastric band fitted in China. So there you have it; as the third horseman of the Apocalypse (riding the black horse of famine) rides across the Autocratic Kingdom of Korea his monarch has been suffering from gluttony.

    His Despotic Majesty Jong-un the First of North Korea (the custom in Korea is to be addressed by one’s surname first and then given name second, e.g; Bond, James) was born on 8th January 1983 which makes him just 31.

    British Gazette Readers may be interested to know that the King has a consort, a Queen. She is Queen Sol-Ju. She is known as “Comrade Ri Sol Ju”. Presumably North Korea’s King addresses her as “Comrade Queen.” Below, a picture of the Royal couple:One wonders what our Queen’s reaction would be were Mr Ed Miliband to become Prime Minister and addressed her as such? Maybe HRH the Duke of Edinburgh should try it and report to this organ via its comments section the results?

    It appears that Mr Kim and Mrs Ri have a two year old daughter, Princess Ju-ae (Kim Ju-ae – in Anglicised form that is Miss Ju-ae Kim).

    For the record, Mr Rodman first met the man whom he now calls his friend in early 2013 when he visited North Korea to host basketball exhibitions. It appears King Jong-un is a basketball fan as well as being an aficionado of US style junk food. We suppose his love of burgers is in order to get the “full basketball experience.” Bye the way, Mr Rodman has said that Mr Kim is a “great dad.” This about the man who literally fed the little girl’s great uncle to the family’s dogs!

    On a more serious level the continued existence of this despotic state is a genuine cause for concern. It is also instructive as North Korea would not exist were it not for the support given to it by China.

    In our article “Hong Kong: The irresistible force versus the immovable object.” of 2nd October 2014 (http://www.british-gazette.co.uk/2014/10/02/hong-kong-the-irresistible-force-versus-the-immovable-object/) we referred to the traditional inability to be seen to “loose face” on the part of the Chinese leadership. This is something they share with most other Chinese.

    The problem with North Korea is well known: at some point the state will collapse. Freed of their tyrannical masters the North Koreans will want union with the successful democratic South Korea. The problem will be that the levels of poverty, deprivation and under development in the north are colossal. The Democratic Republic of Germany proved an expensive challenge for the Federal Republic of Germany to absorb. North Korea will be far more of a challenge to South Korea.

    Of course the supreme irony will likely be that in a decade or so’s time the Chinese economy will have grown to such an extent that it will have the resources to take over the north. That is to say the entire state is likely to be privatised with all land, mineral resources and infrastructure sold at knock down prices to Chinese billionaires who will literally become the owners of North Korea. They will of course be still Good Communists! Just like Tony Blair is a Good Socialist! With all those palatial residences!

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