• Revealed: Your Editor’s cunning plan! To tempt Fate!

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    Above, an excerpt from the talkie Top Hat (1935) with Fred Astaire performing, “Putting on my top hat” – music and lyrics by Irving Berlin.

    There are not many times when the British Gazette and the Guardian agree, but your Editor fully concurs with Barney Ronay in his SportBlog article on the extraordinarily unlikely success of Leicester City FC.
    GOTO: http://www.theguardian.com/football/blog/2016/may/02/leicester-city-champions-premier-league?utm_source=esp&utm_medium=Email&utm_campaign=GU+Today+main+NEW+H+categories&utm_term=170100&subid=15907465&CMP=EMCNEWEML6619I2
    Such was the remoteness of the possibility of such an event at the start of the football season the now Unfortunate Mr Lineker made the rash statement that were such an extraordinarily unlikely event to come to pass, he would present “Match of the Day” in his underwear.

    Words such as “hostage” and “fortune” will likely be figuring prominently in our Unfortunate Friend’s mind! Naturally the press cannot resist reminding our Unfortunate Friend of his undertaking. The schadenfreude displayed by the Daily Telegraph is typical.
    GOTO: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/sport/2016/05/03/gary-lineker-to-present-match-of-the-day-in-his-underwear-after/
    At this point, our Unfortunate Friend may be reflecting that the old Chinese curse, “May you live in interesting times” should be changed to, “May you live in surreal times where the seemingly impossible occurs on a regular basis!”
    Reflecting upon these extraordinarily unlikely events, your Editor has come up with a cunning plan to win the Brexit vote on Thursday 23rd June, 2016!
    Given the perverse and persistent enthusiasm of Leave.EU (https://leave.eu/) and Grassroots Out (https://www.facebook.com/GrassrootsOut/) to do the other side’s work for them – by a regular series of “own goals” the chances of us winning the Brexit vote at the end of June appears even more remote than the chances of “The Foxes” winning the Premier League back at the start of the season! Therefore on the basis that “the fates they do conspire against us” your Editor will make a Rash Promise of his own! In the fervent hope that “The Fates” will seek to punish your Editor form tempting them!

    During my move from the West Riding of Yorkshire to Cornwall I was sorting through what to take and what not to take – and not possessing a wife who invariably acts to restrain the masculine trait of keeping something as it might still come in handy – came across my black tie outfit that is a 1980’s double breasted dinner jacket, dress trousers with the silk strip down the sides, black silk cummerbund, black bow tie and white (not frilly) dress shirt. Not having worn it for over a decade (a typical situation with many Readers we are sure!) I thought it best to try it on as if it did not fit it would be one more item for that essential repository for those moving house – the charity shop! As turned out, amazingly, the “penguin outfit” still fit me! It was therefore packed up for the journey down to Cornwall.
    This therefore is the Rash Undertaking: that should the British People vote for the United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland to leave the European Union on Thursday 23rd June 2016, your Editor will don his “penguin suit” for the Morning Service at the parish church on Sunday 26th June! In the sure and certain hope of much ribald comment and ridicule!
    Since the vicar is German and well knows how to fully indulge in an excess of schadenfreude, let us all hope your Editor will come to regret this promise!

    • What do you mean ’should’ we vote to leave? Get the suit hung up and ready to wear, you’ll be needing it.

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